FOUND TRUE LOVE

Thursday, April 27, 2006

the world is full of FUCKERS!

im sick but nobody gives a fuck!
all they care about is themselves.

it's time to stop being selfish. im sorry to those who i hurt indirectly. im sorry that all this has churned into such a big thing and has unintentionally dragged u guys into this. im very sorry. i hope u all will forgive me. what's worse is the pple who are hurt in this shit are pple i cant show im sorry to. cuz from the start, they hate me.

the pple who dun hate me from the start... the pple who love and care for me... they are the ones putting me in this vulnerable and degrading position. fuck u for being such a bastard. seriously. i shall not spell all yr hideous deeds on my blog... but listen hard and listen good...

FUCK YOU BASTARD!

its as simple as that. just fuck off. u noe... ive seriously never seen a more shameless and indecent man as u are. what's the stitch manz? u think by doing what u did it has put u on a higher pedestal? u think uve got the upper hand now?

well, it's time to snap out of it and realise that uve degraded yrself and touch whatever conscience u have left... let it speak to you and tell you that u suck.

as for the other you... i wish u all the best with him. im sorry u got dragged into this and i hope u salvage the situation in time. i truly am sorry. pls forgive me.

as for you... im on yr side... why wldnt i be. i just wish u wld consider my position and feelings abit more...

as for the another other you... im truly sorry too. u definitely dun deserve all this. im truly apologetic. i really am.

and as for you AGAIN... ure so damn FUCKED UP! my vocab seems limited when it comes to addressing you... but i guess who can blame me? i cant find no other words...

i give up... my life is in a mess and everything's going boncus... my life's a mess. im going mad and nobody seems to understand.

i almost killed myself last night. tonight, u guys have done me the favour of homicide.

why thank you!

always monsteroo 00:47

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Monday, April 24, 2006

i dun understand anything that just happened...

im really lost...

im really broken.

i really dun understand at all.

always monsteroo 22:51

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i love the stars... but they disappear once night falls
i love being happy... but happiness cant be bought at the mall.

i love being treated nicely... but i know it will end one day
i love being wanted and loved... but i know it will just be a week's play.

i love dolphins... but they dun leap out of the water always
i love my sister... but she's left and i wont see her for endless days.

i love reading... but good books always have to end
i love playing the piano... but my parents always say i sound like a noisy band.

why do all good things have to end?
why do you have to stop being nice and live life like it was again?

why can i never trust?
why izzit that my hopes and dreams always go bust?

i hate my life now. i really do.
i wish i could dig a hole and burry myself in it till im through.
i hate the way i feel and behave.
most of all, i hate the way good things in life must deface.

why cant u treat me nice forever?
why cant u want us always together?
why cant u understand my distrust?
why cant u sooth my heart and not disappear so fast?

my mummy always told me...
all good things must come to an end.
no good thing lasts for eternity.
and its a fact of life i must understand.

but will u be my angel from heaven?
will u let me be happy and never dishearten?

will u be nice to me forever?
importantly, will u never let my heart tatter?

always monsteroo 13:13

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Sunday, April 23, 2006

today ROCKED!!!

literally... :)

always monsteroo 01:06

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Friday, April 21, 2006

To love is to share life together
to build special plans just for two
to work side by side
and then smile with pride
as one by one, dreams all come true.

To love is to help and encourage
with smiles and sincere words of praise
to take time to share
to listen and care
in tender, affectionate ways.

To love is to have someone special
one who you can always depend
to be there through the years
sharing laughter and tears
as a partner, a lover, a friend.

To love is to make special memories
of moments you love to recall
of all the good things
that sharing life brings
love is the greatest of all.

I've learned the full meaning
of sharing and caring
and having my dreams all come true;
I've learned the full meaning
of being in love
by being and loving with you.

always monsteroo 01:34

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Love is the greatest feeling,
Love is like a play,
Love is what I feel for you,
Each and every day.

Love is like a smile,
Love is like a song,
Love is a great emotion,
That keeps us going strong.

I love you with my heart,
My body and my soul,
I love the way I keep loving,
Like a love I can't control.

So remember when your eyes meet mine,
I love you with all my heart,
And I have poured my entire soul into you,
Right from the very start.

always monsteroo 01:32

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i really miss my year one days manz... haiz...

oh wells...

im bored. im kinda worried i cant get into NUS... brah! NTU just sent me an interview letter... for my Arts Education degree... so sianz la...

always monsteroo 01:17

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Thursday, April 20, 2006

i dun even noe wad im doing at this time of the night actually... its 2 am and im not asleep...

and im hungry... thanks to Jamie and her rattling on food... haha! and her stupid idea to climb out of the window to have supper. haha! pls... but im really hungry now... haiz...

tomolo lunch got Seoul Garden! yummy yummy yummy! quite excited for it actually... hope it turns out well. yea...

tomolo shld be a gd day... there have been many good days actually... since Saturday till now... haha!

so happy la...

hope that things will turn out fine manz... :D

always monsteroo 02:06

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Tuesday, April 18, 2006

hmmm... i haf nothin much to say actually... just wanted to write smth on my blog.

yah... hope everybody who comes across my blog's doin fine. yeps.

trust is really important i feel. in the past 2 weeks or so there're so many events arnd me that involve trust. trust is so fundamental in all inter-personal relationships? yah manz... like be it between a couple, or between friends, or colleagues for that matter, trust is so darn important in life.

when u dun trust a person, u start to lose confidence in that person. u start to lose confidence in yourself even. u start to feel insecure, sensitive and negative. its so upsetting for yrself and for the person u dun trust. u go mad and the person u dun trust goes mad too? gosh...

Trust... its so damn fragile la can? its like it takes forever to build up trust... but so easy to break it. and once it's broken its broken to the extent where its unrepairable? haiz... not totally unrepairable... but its really very difficult to build it back again.

love without trust is totally unmeaningful. love runs on trust. at least to me. a rship without trust is no relationship, but a companionship.

feelin so loved by a person is one thing. but trusting a person is another. but i guess at least the love is there.

i dunno what im rattling about also. haha! but yea... i cant wait to print fotos to put around my room.

and i can tell ure tryin very hard... i really from deep down in my heart appreciate it. i really hope things will work out.

always monsteroo 01:03

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Thursday, April 13, 2006

CONGRATS VJCHOIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

manz... so happy for them. but hope their grand finals will go well. yeps...

hmm... been a rather sianz and draggy day. but tomolo will be entertaining and fun! cant wait.

i wanna eat macs breakfast and i wanna bake brownies!

always monsteroo 00:04

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Wednesday, April 12, 2006

sense of accomplishment... packed and reorganised my whole room... so happy! haha! now's left to packing my clothes cupboard and buying some stuff to make my room look pretty... threw away alot of things while packing up my room manz... amazing how ive been keeping so much junk. haha!

tomolo got driving lesson again. havent driven in like one month? sianz...

suddenly feel like there's no drive in life again. dun like this kinda feeling... wad is wrong with me recently? why does my mood keep swinging? this sucks...

hey, i miss you.

always monsteroo 00:56

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Monday, April 10, 2006

Man Utd versus Arsenal - good game... best soccer match ive watched in months. well done.

haiz... im having a very bad case of tummy ache. been going on the whole day. i dunno wad i ate wrong. sianz. haiz...

had a very fun day today with my buddies... i miss school days when we used to be together. felt so bonded and so nice today... was so... manz... haha!

i wonder how the choir is doin manz... shld have had their opening ceremony and first category competed oredi. hope they did well... waiting for some news from the other side... so exciting... think their Sacra got alot of hope manz... their songs are very strong pieces and they sound so nice... so sacra... so beautiful...

anyway, ive been thinkin about you yah? and i really hope u din come into my life to affect me again. spent my whole day thinkin of you. u must be honoured... but yah... pls get out of my life... having u in my thoughts the whole day is fucking painful. why do u have to keep coming into my life to hurt me? i noe i hurt u bad before... but im trying to move on, we're tryin to move on... why do u still have to come and affect me? why do u still hafta come and haunt me... just fuck off ok? really... just fuck off...

anyway, i bought a gio navy green tee that i like alot... i still wanna buy my U2 3/4 pants... and i think im gonna start a new address book... so im looking for a nice and suitable one for myself... yea. went borders today cldnt find... maybe Muji will have wad i want. yeps...

i gotta start cleaning my room tomolo... sianz la... haiyo...

and i watched the whole of liu xing hua yuan through again over the past few days... of cuz, i wish i were in shan cai's place... instead of bring in dao ming si's place...

i miss VJChoir... jia you wor VJChoir...

always monsteroo 01:07

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Monday, April 03, 2006

im not looking forward to the next few days... or rather weeks... i reali am not... haiz...

anyway... i saw a Kenneth Cole watch that im in love with... just that its a guy watch so... yah... haha! but its reali nice... it reali is... my goodness... seriously, im in love...

oh ya manz... today i bought my beautiful adidas jacket... WOW!!!! i bought the black one... its super nice la... heh! yeps yeps...

watched ICE AGE 2 today... haha! very cute and funny... and im in love with Mammoth Hair... :D

finally finished my mum's legion poster... tiring sia... but i think it looks quite nice... just that in all accident i spelled "have" as "haf"... haiz... but its not such a bad sin is it? haha!

yeps yeps... k la.. nights to the world...

18 12.21.36.36.21 22.110.13.36.23 37.19.14.13 15.18.37.13 12.18.15.26 16.19.17

i reali do...

always monsteroo 00:23

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Sunday, April 02, 2006

GO GO GO VJCHOIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

im reali excited for VJChoir... ahhh... went for their performance today and they sounded good... well... musicality abit lacking... but you go manz VJChoir... im so proud of you guys and im reali excited manz... GO WIN GRAND PRIZEEEEEEEEEE!!!!! haha! okie... recorded down their performance... tomolo gonna watch it in detail... must rmbr to bring out the cable... rmbr rmbr... tryin to commit it to memory...

u noe i think this is funny... cuz im like typing my entire train of thoughts out... haha! oh wells...

yeps... morning went for work... was late... manz... but im kinda starting to enjoy Sat classes cuz im gettin to noe my work and place there on sat... and im startin to know the kids and talk to them... more like inter-personal rship with them... there's this boy called Samuel.. Samuel Woo... he's K2... he's so adorable... i do private teachin with 4 of them... Samuel, Aiman, Serafina and Ryan... they're such an adorable bunch... den the slowie powies of P1 also so cute la... aiyolamak!!! basically im enjoying Sats more... im enjoyin Sats alot... im enjoying every day i work... ahh.... i dowan to go uni... i wanna keep teaching these kids... they're my babiesssssss...

okok... im mad... this morning woke up reali early to make breakfast... it was quite an experience... may not have been the best breakfast or the yummiest... but it came from the heart... yeps...

tomolo i wanna go see my adidas jacket... and i wanna watch Ice Age 2... yay! heh...

oh anyway... i went shopping with Sheena on fri... yesterday... during our lunch break... combed Bugis... and i bought like 3 slippers... haha! i bought my "been-wanting" slippers for 30 bucks... neckermann... :D so damn happy la... wore today with my weird top... haha! im very happy today. i realised that if u make pple u love happy, ull be happy too! yea yea... and the other 2 slippers are casual wear at home slippers... haha! very nice... 2 for 16 bucks... one nice plain black one... another brownish flower kind... so pretty la... haha!

oh manz... i fell in love with an adidas jacket there at bugis... and i fell in love with a fossil watch!!! ahhhhh... okok... im mad... me and Shee decided that every Friday will be shoppin day for us! yay! im so excited manz... we're gonna go to all the places we can go... TM, Century, Bugis, Marina... we're still thinkin of places to go... yeps...

oh... me and Shee ate at V8 cafe... for lunch on Friday... and we both ordered chicken chop... den we asked them to change the wedges to fries la... wah piang eh... they reali change until there was an overload of fries for us... it was reali farnee... me and shee took fotos... yeps...

hmmm... VJChoir's flying off on Thurs... im gonna miss everybody... boo hoo hoo...

anyways tomolo got a few things to complete... or rather... my train of thoughts again... gotta go develop mum's fotos... gotta go buy board, silver paper... gotta bring cable to watch video... actually... surprise surprise but i wanna go play pool too...

ull be glad to hear that...

always monsteroo 00:27

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